Post by Adam Sanders on Apr 8, 2017 18:36:29 GMT
"...Well, I guess I should preface this with one obvious statement. I'm not Adam Sanders."
The man standing in front of the camera is clearly not the Michigan native. The Los Angeles Rams hat covering up what is usually the most recognizable head of hair on a noncompetitor in all of professional wrestling.
"Now, I'm mostly known for being the manager of another wrestler who some of you might know. I don't really have to go on camera for him very often. But little-known fact is I also represent young Adam Sanders. And unlike my main client who does not require me to act as his mouthpiece unless it's a special occasion, Adam is still so bad at public speaking, he's practically wetting himself the moment I hand him a microphone. So here I am, addressing the masses on his behalf! Wait, exactly what is the quote-unquote masses in FAW? This is our first show. Am I sending out Adam to wrestle in front of ten or ten thousand?
"Meh, it doesn't matter. What matters is Adam is teaming up with the chick who likes breaking into musical auditoriums to bash Coldplay against the umbrella obsessed life partner of Tyson Gregory and a girl who doesn't know Adam exists. Do I know how this match is going to end? Hell no.
"But my job is to promote my client, even if he's greener than the vomit that he spews out when he has spoken on camera...just be happy the footage we're using is me talking about this. And you know when the poor kid is able to block out everyone? When he doesn't have to talk. Which is why he actually was able to win a match in #FSociety against a pretty decent wrestler. He was trained by a pretty talented and skilled wrestler that's won three World titles. He just has some work to do on standing in front of a camera and actually using his voice.
"Now, contrary to his reputation of keeping that umbrella closer to him than a child with a security blanket or even closer than that blogger he's engaged to, Julian is the biggest name in this match. He's accomplished more than any of the other people involved in this match. I mean, my client has won literally one match. But the funny thing about tag matches, the most accomplished and gifted brawler can still lose because of one important factor: teamwork. You never know, Cass and Adam could completely click on a level FAW has never seen in its short history. Julian and Bell could end up being all over the place in terms of working together. Julian could end up losing this match despite being the best wrestler in the ring.
"Now, Julian hasn't had his turn yet to speak about the match yet. I'm pretty sure if he sees this video before he records his, he's going to have a field day. I envision him try to point his guns at the man who trained Adam, probably mention something about the goings on involving said trainer in #FSociety, spout some sort of weak insult in my direction, and probably make fun of Adam for the fact he couldn't speak about the match himself. Good, treat my client like he doesn't exist. The reason I'm not even addressing Bell a whole lot is because she didn't even say anything about Adam, at least I know you're going to acknowledge the kid exists.
"But, when the bell sounds, you're more worried about Cass than Adam, and you're probably going to admit that, Julian. You're going to be mentioning that Cass is a much bigger threat. Possibly true. But just remember one thing, Julian: when you least expect it, the tide can turn the moment you give ANYONE even Adam an opening to do something. And that's one thing about the kid: he knows when the opportunity opens up to change the climate of how a match is going.
"Well, since I was instructed to keep this brief, I'll conclude with this. Beware of the people you underestimate, Julian. That's how upsets happen. Walker out."
The manager of Adam Sanders salutes the camera before the camera fades to black.
The man standing in front of the camera is clearly not the Michigan native. The Los Angeles Rams hat covering up what is usually the most recognizable head of hair on a noncompetitor in all of professional wrestling.
"Now, I'm mostly known for being the manager of another wrestler who some of you might know. I don't really have to go on camera for him very often. But little-known fact is I also represent young Adam Sanders. And unlike my main client who does not require me to act as his mouthpiece unless it's a special occasion, Adam is still so bad at public speaking, he's practically wetting himself the moment I hand him a microphone. So here I am, addressing the masses on his behalf! Wait, exactly what is the quote-unquote masses in FAW? This is our first show. Am I sending out Adam to wrestle in front of ten or ten thousand?
"Meh, it doesn't matter. What matters is Adam is teaming up with the chick who likes breaking into musical auditoriums to bash Coldplay against the umbrella obsessed life partner of Tyson Gregory and a girl who doesn't know Adam exists. Do I know how this match is going to end? Hell no.
"But my job is to promote my client, even if he's greener than the vomit that he spews out when he has spoken on camera...just be happy the footage we're using is me talking about this. And you know when the poor kid is able to block out everyone? When he doesn't have to talk. Which is why he actually was able to win a match in #FSociety against a pretty decent wrestler. He was trained by a pretty talented and skilled wrestler that's won three World titles. He just has some work to do on standing in front of a camera and actually using his voice.
"Now, contrary to his reputation of keeping that umbrella closer to him than a child with a security blanket or even closer than that blogger he's engaged to, Julian is the biggest name in this match. He's accomplished more than any of the other people involved in this match. I mean, my client has won literally one match. But the funny thing about tag matches, the most accomplished and gifted brawler can still lose because of one important factor: teamwork. You never know, Cass and Adam could completely click on a level FAW has never seen in its short history. Julian and Bell could end up being all over the place in terms of working together. Julian could end up losing this match despite being the best wrestler in the ring.
"Now, Julian hasn't had his turn yet to speak about the match yet. I'm pretty sure if he sees this video before he records his, he's going to have a field day. I envision him try to point his guns at the man who trained Adam, probably mention something about the goings on involving said trainer in #FSociety, spout some sort of weak insult in my direction, and probably make fun of Adam for the fact he couldn't speak about the match himself. Good, treat my client like he doesn't exist. The reason I'm not even addressing Bell a whole lot is because she didn't even say anything about Adam, at least I know you're going to acknowledge the kid exists.
"But, when the bell sounds, you're more worried about Cass than Adam, and you're probably going to admit that, Julian. You're going to be mentioning that Cass is a much bigger threat. Possibly true. But just remember one thing, Julian: when you least expect it, the tide can turn the moment you give ANYONE even Adam an opening to do something. And that's one thing about the kid: he knows when the opportunity opens up to change the climate of how a match is going.
"Well, since I was instructed to keep this brief, I'll conclude with this. Beware of the people you underestimate, Julian. That's how upsets happen. Walker out."
The manager of Adam Sanders salutes the camera before the camera fades to black.