Post by Cass Baumer on May 26, 2017 11:42:00 GMT
DATE: 05/25/17
CAMERA: ON
What can I say about Sarah Lacklan that hasn't been said to death by now?
She named a podcast PrincessTwilightSexyFang. She constantly trumpeted the fact that she'd beat Tyson Gregory for the #FSociety World Championship only to fail miserably just like all the others. She's nearly as incompetent as the bumbling Moron In Chief Donald Trump who she heralded as the bravest man to ever walk the face of the earth and the best president to ever grace the United States. She keeps threatening to light people on fire when she's done nothing but ends up making herself look like more of a fool with each passing day when she masquerades herself as The Red Queen without a single accomplishment to show for it. Now she's constantly fighting across the world in a sad attempt to scrounge up a couple wins she can use to tout that maybe she's worth more than the mediocre dribble she's been giving FAW.
She's pathetic. She's idiotic. And worst of all, she still refuses to answer my questions.
As Trump's Favorite Princess, surely she would have talked to the homebody president, right? Surely as Donald Trump's Favorite 'Red Queen,' there's been constant discussions between the two — internal memos upon memos about how Sarah Lacklan stepped into the White House, or even the 'Winter White House' in Mar-a-Lago down in Palm Beach Florida. I'm positive that happened! I'm positive that every word that comes out of Sarah Lacklan's mouth — a mouth Kenzi Gray is very familiar with — is the absolute truth!
So, given that information... Why won't Sarah Lacklan answer any of the questions I've been asking her regarding the 70-year-old president she clearly wants to fuck? Why does she keep ignoring the wills of the American people in favor of just being a dumbass instead?
Sarah... I'm not asking for a full book report. I'm just asking for the answers to a few easy questions...
Why did Donald Trump fire James Comey - the head of the FBI that was investigating his involvement with Russia? Why did Donald Trump tell so many people behind the scenes to drop the investigation at all? Do you think an innocent man who followed the law would need to ask people to stop investigating him? Does that make any sense to you?
What do you think of the newest version of TrumpCare? People are calling it the reverse Robin Hood health care plan. It's going to steal from the poor and give to the rich. How will you deal with the fact that you've lost your insurance? How will you deal with the fact that it's the exact opposite of what Donald Trump promised when he was running?
How does it feel to know that if the bill passes, everyone you've ever known, everyone you've ever loved and everyone you've ever hated will all be ready and willing to leave you a broken, bloody mess for not stopping Donald Trump when you had the chance?
As Trump's Favorite Princess, you could call him. You could tell him that this is a bad idea. You could do something worthy of your time instead of pretending you're fucking royalty when you're just a sad little girl who hasn't lived up to a SINGLE WORD you've ever said!
You're just like your president.
Everyone knows that you've never spoken to the president. Everyone knows the president doesn't even know you exist. We know you don't follow politics and we know you're just using the name to get attention. We know you don't give a fuck about the American people who are going to die because of his sheer stupidity. All you care about is tweeting out these ridiculous photoshopped images where Donald Trump's face is behind the Iron Man mask, where Donald Trump looks like Captain America. You're a child playing with tools you don't understand, and you're an idiot for even once mentioning that he's ever done a single good thing for you, the American people, or anyone on the planet!
It's an act. You probably voted for Hilary Clinton. That, or you're too morally constipated and too blind to see the country crashing around you every single time Trump makes a new horrid decision.
You challenged me to a one on one match. FAW isn't good enough for you. You would rather have us fight one on one elsewhere — I guess because you're afraid to look like even more of an idiot to the FAW audience. And you know what? I accepted the challenge.
I will fight you one on one in whichever wrestling promotion you decide once Donald Trump has either resigned from the presidency or been indicted for all of his crimes. Quote me on this.
You're doing this on my terms. The fact that you give more of a fuck about a one on one match elsewhere shows me how much you care about the FAW Hardcore Championship. It shows me how much you give a fuck about the FAW audience, about the FAW roster. It shows me you'd rather take a huge dump on FAW just like your president took a huge dump on the United States of America.
You're the Donald Trump of wrestling — the entire world knows you're a joke and with each passing second, you fall further into the abyss you can't quite climb out of. You've become a slave to the catchphrases, a walking parody of yourself ever since you've failed to beat me at FAW Idles Of March. You lost to Tyson Gregory right after you announced yourself a queen and then you lost again to Redemption Wrestling's own Honey in the International Elite Cup 2017. You're a disgrace to this sport, you're a disgrace to FAW and worst of all, you're a disgrace to your father's legacy!
You're a disgrace to your father on a personal level too but that's pretty much a given here.
So tell me, Sarah. Are you going to show up to FAW #DirtyDeeds giving a fuck about the championship or am I going to have to put that Lacklanland insurance company to work one last time before your president takes it away from you?